


The Devil Within

by The_Crystal_Rose



Category: Dragon Ball Z
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Universe - Dark, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Heavy Angst, Horror, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Rape, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-19
Updated: 2017-11-29
Packaged: 2017-12-15 12:15:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/849468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Crystal_Rose/pseuds/The_Crystal_Rose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vegeta is married to Bulma, and hasn’t been married to her for very long. In his past, he’s done some very terrible things, some that Bulma is much aware of and others that he never wants her to find out. However, due to the terrifying nightmares that haunts the Prince at night, Bulma comes to realize that there is much to her husband she doesn’t know. And after a terrible accident, things begin to unravel between the two, revealing more than Bulma ever intended to know. Will they be able to make it work and can Bulma cure her husband of his past demons?</p><p>[Transferred from Fanfiction.net and discontinued]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: The story contains graphic details such as: sexual content, adult language, rape, and violence (more may be added as the story progresses). It is highly recommended that if you are of the ages 17 and younger that you do not read any further due to the rating of this story. This is a purely “read at your own risk” warning, and I will not be held accountable for whatever or whoever happens to fall upon this story. You have been warned fairly!
> 
> *Anything in italics is considered a flashback and graphic!*

How many times had this happened? How many times would she wake up in the middle of the night to find her entire bedroom illuminated with a blue light, a light that was emitting from the hands of the form that lay unconscious next to her. She gazed down at him sadly, her arms wrapped around her knees as she watched him struggle in his sleep. Sweat covered his entire body, his face was scrunched with what seemed like pain, and the occasionally grunts and moans could be heard from deep within his chest.

This wasn’t anything new and that’s what scared her.

Bulma knew Vegeta was plagued by nightmares of his past, but after nearly a month of peace, she had thought he had finally rid himself of any of those dreadful dreams. Yet, here she sat, awake at two in the morning while she watched her husband toss and turn in his sleep, the light that was currently surrounding his fisted hands glowing brighter and brighter. She bit her lip, the urge to wake him and end his suffering powerful, yet his previous warning stopped her from doing such a thing.

She could remember the very first time she had awoken to such a sight and a shiver ran down her spine at the memory.

_It was during the time of their affair, before Trunks. After a rather lusty night together between the sheets, the two fell into a deep sleep, something uncommon to them both. They never before shared a bed—normally one of the two would immediately leave the room after their lusty bouts—and when Bulma awoke later that night to find the room glowing with his blue ki caused her to panic. She had sat up and turned over to find him in the midst of a nightmare, just from the look of his twisted face and decided to wake him up. Yet, if she knew how he would’ve reacted, she would’ve left him asleep, got up from the bed, and left the room for her own safety._

_She had reached down and shook him, her hands gentle on his shoulders, yet her shaking was urgent. It didn’t take long and Bulma jumped in surprised when Vegeta’s eyes sprang open, the hand closest to her shooting out to grasp her around her throat, squeezing tightly, while the other lifted to hover above her head, glowing dangerously, threateningly, and Bulma screamed his name in horror and fear._

_And it was that very scream that saved her life. He was panting heavily, his eyes were unfocused, and his arms and hands were trembling severely, but soon, the foggy haze in his eyes began to clear and he realized who he held in his deadly grasp. He had dropped her and yanked himself back as if she was a disease, while she rubbed at her sore neck and coughed as sweet air filled her lungs. They sat there, staring at one another and neither of them said anything, both for entirely different reason._

_She had taken several minutes to gather her wits while he sat there on the bed, gazing down at his hands with an unreadable look. Finally, after time passed, Bulma asked hoarsely, “Are you okay?”_

_He lifted his head in surprise and blinked at her question. Was_ he _okay? She was the one that was strangled and nearly killed and she was asking him if he was okay?_

_Without answering her, Vegeta had gotten up from the bed, leaning over to grab his spandex shorts and pulled them on. Then, he walked out of the room, and Bulma watched, her brows furrowing at his departure. She waited there on the bed for several moments, a part of her expecting him to return, but she knew he had left for the rest of the night. Sighing, she stood and gathered her scattered clothes and threw them on haphazardly, before chasing after the prince, the curious scientist in her winning over the logically scared human._

_She ran outside, expecting to find him in the simulator, only to be disappointed when she saw the chamber was empty. She then searched the yard and sighed when there wasn’t a sign of his presence. When she turned to walk back to the compound, a movement from above caught her eye and she looked up just in time to see the legs of the Prince swinging over the ledge and disappearing from her sight._

_Bulma smirked and ran back inside. He wasn’t the only one who could get on top of the roof. She threw open the door to her room, before she ran out onto her balcony, and began to climb over the railing to the piping alongside the wall of the compound. She grabbed onto it and began to climb, making sure of her footing as she shimmied up the wall of the compound. After a good minute of climbing, Bulma lifted herself onto the roof quietly and made her way over to where the Prince was currently laying._

_His form was tense as she approached him and she sat beside him silently, her arms encircling her knees in a protective gesture. She waited for him to acknowledge her presence and when he didn’t, she bit her lip when she broke the tense silence between them._

_“You didn’t hurt me,” she whispered reassuringly._

_He scoffed as he stared up at the night sky. “You really think I care whether or not I hurt you?”_

_“Yes,” she said confidently, her eyes now on his face. “I know you care, Vegeta. You don’t have to say it.”_

_“You’re a fool, onna.”_

_Instead of responding to his insult, she went straight to the point. “How long have you been having nightmares?”_

_Vegeta’s jaw twitched, his eyes meeting hers briefly in a harsh glare, before he returned to gaze at the sky._

_“I do not have nightmares,” he stated as if it were a simple fact._

_Bulma frowned disbelieving. “Then what was that?”_

_“It is none of your concern, onna. Now leave me in peace, you annoying wench!” The next thing he knew, Bulma was straddling him, her face blocking his view of the star-lit sky, causing him to glower at her forward behavior. They may be fucking, but that didn’t mean she had the right to be so upfront with him._

_Bulma met his gaze equally, her frown deepening at his response, and she placed her hands on his shoulders in a sad attempt to keep him laying there. “Don’t you think I deserve an explanation? I wake up to find the whole fucking room lit up with your ki and when I try to wake you, you nearly kill me! So, please, tell me that’s normal for you and I’ll leave you be,” she exclaimed defiantly, knowing from his shocked expression that she had him. When he continued to remain silent, she took her hands off his shoulders and sat up straight. “We both know that’s not normal for you. I know I get on your nerves, but no matter how angry I’ve made you, you never raised your hand at me… not like that.”_

_Vegeta’s right eye began to twitch uncontrollably as she continued to talk. He didn’t want to admit that she was right. He had never raised his hand to her before. Whenever he felt he was going to lose control of his temper, he would leave the room, and her, behind. He wasn’t sure what it was about her, but he couldn’t bring himself to hurt her like that… no matter his past discretions. And when he felt he was close enough to do damage, he would storm out and fly off to a place she couldn’t follow._

_Finally, when her ranting trailed off, Vegeta slowly sat up, placing his hands almost gently on her hips to lift her off him. She obliged and sat beside him, watching as he brought his knee up to rest his arm on top of it, his eyes distant as he stared off into space. He felt he didn’t owe her an explanation, but her insistence was getting to him._

_“You can talk to me, ya know? I’ll listen…”_

_Her offer shocked him and he turned his head to gaze at her questioningly. Should he tell her? Should he really tell her what his nightmare was about, give the explicit and gory details of the torment he endured in his dream that was very much a reality for him?_

_He thought about it long and hard, but his decision was made when she gazed at him with a gentle, innocent look. No. He wouldn’t tell her. He couldn’t understand why, but the thought of tainting the innocence of her soul with the foul impurity of his past wasn’t something he could bring himself to do._

_Instead, he said this, “If we’re to continue this,” he gestured with his head between the two of them, a knowing look on his face, “then, you need to know something.”_

_Bulma nodded and inched forward, prepared to hear whatever it was he was willing to tell her._

_“If that happens again… Do not wake me up.”_

_She blinked in surprise, not expecting that. “O-okay…”_

_Vegeta growled, his eyes narrowing. “I’m serious, onna. If you value your life, you will not wake me up if that happens again.”_

_“But… I can’t just let you go through something like that—” she began to say, but when he snarled, she immediately shut her mouth._

_“Promise me this, Bulma!”_

_At that, she could only nod and mutter an “I promise, Vegeta,” to him. It wasn’t like him to ever use her name and the seriousness of the situation settled heavy on her shoulders. If it was what he wished, then she would do it for his sake… and her own._

_She couldn’t help, though, to feel a bit of warmth at his obvious concern for her safety._

Ever since then, whenever they stayed together at night, she never woke him up, no matter how much she wanted to, just to end his suffering. She never knew what it was he dreamt of, but she knew it was bad. She constantly wondered what he saw behind his closed eyelids, but he would never indulge her in his nightmares. And it bothered her to no end.

So, instead of giving into her urge, she just sat there, watching as his head tossed back and forth while he muttered in his sleep. Occasionally, she could hear the name Frieza pop out of his mouth in a hateful spat, but anything else he muttered was nearly inaudible, so after awhile, she gave up trying to understand.

Bulma wasn’t sure how long she sat there watching her husband suffer at the hands of a nightmare, but soon, the blue light that emitted from his hands began to fade and eventually, his tossing and turning calmed. She sighed with relief as she watched his tense form relax, his heavy panting evening out and finally she lay back down next to her husband and cuddled close to him. It wouldn’t be long before he woke up and in times like that she wanted to pretend she was asleep so he wouldn’t flee at knowing she had witnessed his display of weakness.

When she felt him stir, Bulma closed her eyes and feigned sleep, her head nearly resting on the same pillow as his, her hand slithering underneath the pillow to make it look like she had simply just turned over for comfort. Several moments later, she could feel him sit up, the bed dipping as he moved to sit on the edge of the mattress and then, she didn’t feel anything.

Peeking an eye open, she saw his scarred back facing her, his head lowered and his arms resting atop his knees and the sight nearly broke her heart. He sat there, his hands running along his face as he woke up and he flinched when he felt her hands rest against his back. He shifted when those hands slid around his waist and she hugged him from behind, her bare breasts pressing against his heated back as she embraced him.

“Why don’t you tell me about your nightmares?” Bulma whispered to him, her chin resting on his shoulder.

“Onna…” Vegeta began only to trail off when he had nothing to really say.

“I hate seeing you suffer. You don’t get any rest. You toss and turn, you’re ki flares up, and you sweat like you’re in the battle of your life. Talk to me, tell me, please,” she pleaded as she nuzzled him beneath his ear.

Vegeta sighed and closed his eyes, allowing him this one moment to bask in his mates embrace, her warm breath caressing his ear as she pleaded with him to open up to her.

“I can’t, Bulma…”

“Vegeta—”

“I said no!” He exclaimed before he pulled himself from his mate’s embrace, his scarred back disappearing into the bathroom. It wasn’t long before Bulma could hear the shower running and she sighed sadly. Again, he would escape to the simulator and again, she would have to dress his self-inflicted wounds.

What more could she do? If he refused to say anything to her, then she couldn’t help him.

Minutes later, the water turned off and shortly after, Vegeta emerged from the bathroom, dressed in his spandex shorts. He never spared her a glance as he made his way towards the bedroom door, but he halted when she spoke.

“Please, Vegeta… I hate it when you do this…” she murmured. “I’m only trying to help you.”

He stood there, his shoulder’s tense, but at her words, they drooped a bit, his head dipping forward as he let out a long breath. When he turned around to speak, again, his mate cut him off.

“You don’t have to tell me now, if you don’t want to. I understand. But, please… don’t keep it in forever.”

Vegeta stared at her for a long moment before he nodded once, turned, and left the room. He knew she would find out one day. Maybe not from his mouth directly, possibly from his dreams, but he knew…

It was only a matter of time…

_oOo_

_…TBC…_


	2. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vegeta continues to believe he doesn't have a problem, however as time progresses, his flashbacks are getting worse and Bulma is coming to the realization that her husband is a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. What happens if time runs out?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Chapter rating NC17 due to RAPE!

" _You failed me," He said calmly, his eyes boring down on the young man that knelt before him at the edge of the dais. "I asked you to bring back the Lords youngest, untouched, and you brought me back this filthy, thin creature, who has clearly been defiled. You will tell me which one of your men had their way with her before me."_

_The prince bit the inside of his cheek but refused to answer. It was forbidden to touch any woman-slave before the Emperor had a taste of them and if he wasn't satisfied, the poor creatures would be thrown to the barracks for any solider to play with. And unfortunately, they never played nice._

_How was the prince to know that one of his own would go against his word?_

_They were flying over the barren land with the girl in Vegeta's arms when they were attacked out of nowhere. Snarling, the prince threw the young girl in the arms of his trusted comrade, Raditz with the command to take cover and protect the merchandise before he flew off after the attackers, never realizing his mistakes when he came back to find the girls clothing torn, bite marks marring her once untouched skin and blood covering her thighs from an obvious forceful penetration and Vegeta closed his eyes in regret._

_It didn't matter what he could say to his lord and master, he was the one at fault. And for that, his team would bear the consequences, not just him… though he would experience the worse._

" _Not going to answer me, I see," Frieza murmured as he rose to his feet, his large tail thumping onto the ground behind him as he licked his lips. He turned to his second, Zarbon, and commanded, "Get the other two monkeys, take them to the pit. Their prince will join them shortly."_

_Zarbon smirked, causing Vegeta's stomach to churn at the ugly way it twisted his face, and he bowed deeply. "As you say, Lord Frieza."_

_Vegeta watched out of the corner of his eye as Zarbon left the throne room with nearly a bounce in his step before he returned his attention back to the lizard in front of him and what he saw caused him to swallow nervously._

_Frieza stood before him, obviously erect, and he nodded to the remaining patrons to leave the throne room, each door closing and locking. "Now, Vegeta, what am I to do with an already used sex-slave, hmm?"_

_With slow, careful steps, Frieza approached the young prince, his eyes darkening as they trailed along the length of the Saiya-jin's body. Vegeta saw this and had to force the bile down that wanted to expel from the pit of his stomach._

" _If you'd just tell me who it was, this would be much easier for you, little monkey," the lizard purred before he suddenly disappeared from Vegeta's sight, causing the Prince to bolt to a standing position, his arms ready to defend himself, but it was too late. Frieza had reappeared behind him and the next thing Vegeta knew, he was sprawled on his stomach with his master's foot pressing into his back firmly._

" _I guess I'll have to have my fun with you, then."_

Vegeta gasped, his eyes springing open wide before he sat up, his breathing labored and sweat covered his body. He took in his surroundings before he sighed and fell back onto the uncomfortable cot that was set in the back of the simulator. How much longer would he be plagued with these memories? He knew it was a punishment, but a part of him wished he could forget them.

And now, he was forcing himself to hide from his wife whom had witnessed too much of his weakness already. Grumbling, Vegeta rolled onto his side as the memory continued to poison his mind, his hands fisting tightly in the sheets to the point of tearing.

_Frieza grunted as he continued to thrust, his hands biting into the young prince's flesh of his back to keep him still as he got himself off. It had been a while since he last took the man that lay beneath him and he had nearly forgotten how satisfying it was to dominate the one who was always defiant of him. Even now, Vegeta tried to fight against the lizard, his teeth clenched and his eyes shut tightly at the unwelcome feeling of being taken unwillingly._

_And it hurt… yet at the same time it felt good._

_Damn the tail. That was how he was caught off guard. The moment his front had met the surface of the floor, Frieza had bent over and grasped the furry appendage in his hand before stroking it like a lover, sending unwanted feelings of pleasure down Vegeta's spine to the pit of his belly. He kept telling himself to fight and that's what he did, but again, Frieza had the upper hand._

_Vegeta had brought his elbow up to strike at the lizard, but his elbow was caught quickly and he screamed when Frieza squeezed it before twisting the arm unnaturally until he heard the satisfying snapping of bones. Now, with his one arm broken and the other one held down tightly by the ugly creature, Vegeta didn't know what else to do. He continued to struggle against his master's clutches, refusing to accept the fact that he was more powerful than the prince, and as he attempted to wiggle free, a strangled moan made him freeze._

" _GET OFF ME!" Vegeta yelled but it was to no avail._

_Frieza chuckled breathlessly, his thrusting now faster and harder and at his words, the lizard arched his back and flexed his hips, causing him to slip in just a bit deeper. Vegeta stiffened. "Just accept this, my little monkey. You're not powerful enough to stop me," Frieza grunted as he trailed his hand down to finger the furry tail._

_Unable to control himself, Vegeta moaned and try as he might, he couldn't stop himself from getting hard as the man continued to roll the tail between his fingers. It took everything in the young prince to force his erection away and shame filled him._

_All he could do was lay there, struggle, and hope it would be over soon._

Unable to escape the clutches of the memory, Vegeta sat up and ran a hand down his face. Sleep wasn't welcomed anymore and training was out of the question due to his injuries that he inflicted on himself from his last nightmare he had. He glanced down at his bruised and battered body and knew the moment his mate saw the state he was in she would throw a fit.

He sighed and stood before throwing the cot back in its upright position into the wall of the simulator. He then turned towards the console and engaged the gravity before he began a series of kata's to work out his stress. The memory was still fresh in his mind and he forced it away, focusing solely on his movements. He was so wrapped up in his swings that he never noticed the knocking at the simulators door.

Pushing the memory away was futile and it continued to flash in his mind, and soon, it wasn't just him in the simulator. Standing across from him was the figure of his tormentor. He growled, his ki rising rapidly and his eyes narrowed to slits as the lizard smirked at him. The moment the creature's finger wagged at him in a  _come hither_  motion, Vegeta struck into action, completely oblivious to how out of control his ki was and who was just outside the simulator's door.

"Vegeta?" Bulma called from the ramp that lead up to the simulator. "Come on, you've been in there for over fourteen hours, I think it's time you came out!" She tapped her fingers against her crossed arms as she waited. After minutes passed, Bulma's hand fisted and she banged it on the door in hopes he could hear it. "Vegeta! Turn off the damn simulator and come out! You haven't eaten in hours and I made lunch!"

Growling, Bulma turned to leave the simulator but the whining noise of the alarm that sat atop the doors halted her departure. She turned her eyes back to the metal dome, her heart racing and she jumped off the ramp before climbing up the ladder alongside the simulator to the small window to see what had happened. She leaned against the metal wall and peered in to see her husband in all his Super Saiya-jin glory, sweat trickling down his body as he disappeared and reappeared out of her sight repetitively, his teeth clenched in a snarl and his arms swing at an invisible force. She jumped off the ladder and ran back to the door and began to key in an override code, grumbling to herself while she did it.

Then, a screen slid out from the small keypad, indicating what she feared. His ki was too high for the simulator to sustain and the dome was going into overload mode. Her eyes widened as she took in the readings of his ki, and memories of when the simulator exploded last time flashed in her mind. She banged on the door again in a panic to warn the man that was currently inside whom was oblivious to what was happening, but just as she tried to warn her husband to lower his ki, the alarm changed and soon, sparks flew out of the screen, the light of the alarm also blowing shortly after.

Bulma turned to run for safety, her feet carrying her down the ramp. She could feel the pressure building from behind her and just as she lifted her eyes to meet their exact copies, the simulator exploded, sending the poor woman flying with the debris of the simulator. The last thing she heard was the screams of her son, his face hovering in her blurred vision before her world faded to black.

_oOo_

It was the strange feeling of his father's ki rising rapidly that awoke him from his sleep. It was the anxiety of his mother that caused him to bolt from his room. And it was the fear that gripped him that caused little Trunks to spring into action when he watched his mother be thrown into the air from the explosion, her back arched and her arms flung out from the suddenness of it.

"MOM!" He had screamed as he watched the metal dome of the simulator break apart with ease, metal sheets flying in every which way, but all he could see was his mother being thrown in mid air, metal hitting her as she began to fall to the ground. In the blink of an eye, six year old Trunks caught the older woman before she hit the ground, his eyes blurred with tears at the state she was now in due to the explosion.

She was bruised and bloodied, her left arm hung loose at her side with what appeared to be bone pushing through the skin. Her clothes were torn from the shrapnel that repelled from the dome and he could clearly tell that some of it was embedded in her skin.

He was hyperventilating from his panic state, unsure of what to do and when he lifted his head to see who was around to help, he saw his father hovering above what use to be the gravity room, his eyes distant as he glanced down at the pile of rubble.

"DAD!" Trunks screamed. "MOM'S HURT!"

At first, Vegeta didn't react and Trunks growled before he picked up a large piece of folded metal and threw it hard at his father, whom caught it before it made contact with him. "DID YOU NOT HEAR ME?!"

Vegeta blinked to clear his vision, the form of Frieza fading away into nothing. The moment he was able to realize what had happened, he glanced around to see the simulator now a pile of metal and his mate bloody and unconscious in his son's arms. His eyes widened and he flew to his son's side, taking his mate into his arms and without another word, he carried her battered body into the compound towards the infirmary, his son hot on his heels.

"What happened, Dad? Why did the simulator explode? Is she going to be okay?" Trunks unleashed as he attempted to keep up with his father's fast pace.

"Quiet, boy!" Vegeta snapped as he stepped into the elevator and pressed for the bottom level with a harsh finger.

Trunks winced and bit the inside of his cheek as he glanced from his father to his mother. He was as confused as ever. For now, all the little one could think of was how badly hurt his mother seemed to be, what little ki she had was wavering dangerously; spiking high before dropping so low it was nearly undetectable. Trunks swallowed heavily as he watched blood drip from her wounds and onto the floor, creating a puddle of red at his father's feet.

It seemed like the elevator ride was taking forever and once the doors finally opened to the med level, Vegeta took off down the hall while barking orders over his shoulder to the nurses that watched him in shock. They all quickly snapped out of it and immediately moved into action, determined to do what it took to save the heiress's life.

Trunks followed behind them all, and when he tried to make his way into the operating room, one of the nurses ushered him out before he could step inside, the door closing firmly in his face and with that, his panic increased tenfold.

_oOo_

Searing pain was what she awoke to. Her fingers twitched uncontrollably due to the amount of agony she was in and her eyes fluttered open to see nothing but white. Her vision was blurry and she blinked repeatedly to clear it, and soon, she could make out the patterns of a ceiling.

Everything ached, from the top of her head to the tip of her toes and she couldn't recall a time she ever felt this much pain at once, yet she couldn't find the energy to produce any sound. Breathing hurt too, but she really couldn't complain about that. At least she was breathing.

Her lips felt dry and cracked, but that was the least of her worries. She wasn't sure of the extent of her injuries, but she knew they must be serious.

She attempted to wiggle her fingers and toes, but stopped as another bout of pain shot through her body.

But then, she was met with a moment of peace. A beeping at the side of her bed made her want to glance over at it, but she was unable to. And soon, her vision began to fade again, the pain that had been tormenting her disappearing as she willingly accepted the darkness of sleep.

_oOo_

… _TBC..._  



	3. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vegeta's flashbacks are getting worse and Bulma awakens from her coma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Chapter rating NC17 due to RAPE!

When Bulma came too again, she could feel she wasn't alone. The searing pain she had awoken to before wasn't as bad this time, but she still didn't know the extent of her injuries and the thought of moving made her nervous. Her lips were cracked and dry from the lack of moisture, indicating that she had been unconscious for quite a lengthy time, the corner of her eyes were crusty with sleep and her body was stiff from being unable to move.

But that was the least of her worries.

It was her dreams that had her on edge. Never in her life had she ever experienced such vivid, terrifying dreams before, the realistic aspects of the dreams almost making her cry out in relief at the thought that they were just that; dreams. She wasn't sure where they came from, why her mind would imagine such horrifying pictures, and the fact that they felt so real, as if they were a memory she had lived through, caused her to tremble and shudder unpleasantly.

And yet, a reoccurring face always made an appearance in them, more than once.

She had only seen Frieza that one time and yes, he had been a brutal and terrifying creature, but never had she dreamt of the tyrant. Nausea crept up on her at the images that were still embedded in her mind and she could almost  _feel_  his hands on her, stroking her, holding her down, and beating her. And she didn't even want to think of what he had done to her while he held her down.

Bulma whimpered as the dream replayed itself in her head as if it were on repeat and she shut her eyes tight in an attempt to chase the horrible images away.

"Onna…" A familiar voice called to her from the right side of her bed, causing her to peek an eye open to see her vision was now filled with the sight of her husband. His gaze was cautious and hesitant, and a flash of what seemed like guilt flew across their depths as he gazed into her own before his eyes wandered around her face, and she knew he was observing her visible injuries.

Bulma opened her mouth to speak, but the moment she attempted any type of sound she immediately began to cough from the dryness of her throat, her eyes shutting tightly again as the pain racked through her body from the violent jerks. A second later, she could feel a hand sliding underneath her head to tilt her, and then she felt the tip of what seemed like a foam cup at her lips, and she immediately began to drink greedily at the cool liquid that was inside.

"Slowly," Vegeta commanded softly and Bulma slowed her drinking before he pulled the cup away from her and she licked her lips.

Clearing her throat, Bulma tried again, her voice raspy. "H-how long was I out?"

Vegeta sat the cup down on the table next to the bed before he rested his elbows on his knees, his head bent forward as if he was a man awaiting execution. The expression he wore was a rare one. He looked guilty, concerned, and… nervous? But that couldn't be right. Bulma had never seen him nervous before, and very rarely had he ever been guilty, and if he ever was, it didn't take long for him to find an excuse to replace his guilt, to turn the situation around to make himself feel better.

But this was different.

Something had happened to him in that simulator.

He sighed. "You've been unconscious for about four days while those idiots you call doctors took care of your more serious injuries."

She was afraid to ask. "What…" she began only to have to clear her throat and lick at her lips before she spoke again, this time a bit more clear. "What are my injuries?"

She watched as he sat back, his eyes on anything but her as he began to list what she had and her heart dropped into her stomach. Her minor injuries consisted of bumps and bruises of various shapes and sizes scattered about her body, yet her more serious injuries were harder to handle. Her left arm was broken beneath her elbow, something she had noticed when she came to the first time. She had shrapnel from the walls of the simulator embedded in her back from when she turned away from the blast, something she had surgically removed over the course of two days. Though her head hadn't hit the ground—thanks to their son who caught her just in time—she had a serious concussion from the explosion as several heavy metal pieces slammed into her cranium. And though she couldn't feel it, she had second and third degree burns marring her skin on her back and her legs from the intense heat of her husband's ki as it erupted all around her.

Some of the cuts she wore were nearly closed up, however a few of them were deep and required stitching. She continued to listen as Vegeta explained to her how much blood she lost because of a piece of the metal wall penetrating her above her right kidney, narrowly missing the organ by just an inch and how he had donated some of his blood in hopes of accelerating her healing process.

So maybe that's why her pain wasn't as bad as before?

He had said she had been out for nearly four days. Bulma sighed and laid her head back onto the pillow carefully, her eyes trained on the ceiling above as she took it all in. A drug induced coma to keep her from feeling any of the pain while they worked on her… Somehow, she should feel relieved she was unconscious for so long instead of wanting to be awake during that amount of time. The span of time she had lost was causing her head to spin a bit.

Vegeta glanced up at his wife who remained silent even after he had finished telling her the extent of her injuries. For days, he blamed himself for losing control; for allowing himself to release so much ki into the air that it erupted like a bomb. He didn't know what was wrong with him. Normally, he had a very good sense of when his mate was near, but for some reason, her presence had been pushed to the furthest part of his mind that day and the result of that was this…

"Is Trunks okay?" Bulma finally asked.

Vegeta blinked and furrowed his brow. Of all the things she worried about… He could never quite guess what she would do or say next, she always left him surprised.

"The boy is fine, he wasn't harmed. He caught you and we brought you here."

Bulma sighed. That wasn't exactly what she had meant. She knew he was fine physically, she remembered him catching her before she blacked out; she could see his worried and panicked eyes staring into hers before everything faded and she wondered how he faired since. Glancing at her husband, her eyes softened. His head was bent, his elbows rested on his knees, and his hands were clasped. He looked like a condemned man awaiting execution.

She knew his nightmares were getting worse, but never did she expect them to plague him outside of his sleep. She was only guessing. It was unlike Vegeta to lose control of his ki. It was why he always trained. He was the master of control and he had lost it, and in the process had nearly killed her if she hadn't turned away.

"Vegeta," she spoke softly.

He tilted his head towards her, but never made eye contact. His left eye twitched and his clasped hands gripped each other tighter, his knuckles turning a pale white, contrasting against the tan of his skin and she knew she'd have to tread carefully.

"Sweetheart… I don't blame you," she began and his eyes finally snapped to hers in disbelief. She continued. "I don't. But your dreams…" his eyes narrowed at that and she reached out with her good hand to wrap it around his clasped ones. "Your dreams are getting worse. I know you won't tell me what happened in there, but you need help, Vegeta," she explained with a trembling voice and he abruptly stood.

"I do not need nor want  _help_ ," he spat.

Bulma's eyes hardened with tears. "Is that what you think? Look where I'm at, Vegeta!" She noticed his left eye twitch again, but she was determined. "I nearly died! If Trunks hadn't caught me, if I hadn't turned away, I wouldn't be here!"

Vegeta growled and stalked away from the bed, his arms crossed as he stood on the other side of the room, his back to her as she continued.

"When will the line be crossed for you?! When I'm dead—"

Bulma squeaked in surprise, her eyes wide as she watched his fist snap out and make contact with the wall, his entire hand disappearing in the hole it created. She licked her lips, her argument dying on the tip of her tongue at the sight of her trembling husband. Her skin prickled and for a moment it felt itchy, but she couldn't seem to scratch the itch away. It was silent for a few moments and Bulma noticed Vegeta wasn't moving; his hand still encased in the wall.

"Vegeta… your hand…"

Vegeta however wasn't hearing her. He stood in the corner of the room, his left eye and jaw twitching, his free hand fisted, and his ki rising. He was no longer seeing the sterile room of the infirmary. He was no longer hearing his wife's nagging voice and he felt none of the pain that would surely be throbbing through his hand.

" _When will the line be crossed for you?!" She had yelled at him. "You don't even give two shits, you rotten bastard—" she gasped when a rock hard hand met with soft cheek, her head turning with the abrupt force behind the smack._

" _I will do what I like, you will not question me you wretched female!" The man took a step back before resuming his pacing._

" _You're willing to just give him up, just like that?" His mother asked in disbelief. "You would give up your own son to that… that… beast?!"_

_The king stopped his pacing. "I will do what I need to do for the good of my people and if that means giving up my own son, then yes. We can always make another."_

_His mother growled and shoved at his chest. "You pig; I am not a breeding machine to which you can enjoy yourself at whenever you please! I am Queen and I will not give up my son without a fight! You will have to kill me!"_

_He chuckled, amusement playing in the depths of his eyes before he quickly reached out and grasped hold of the woman's neck before tossing her across the room and against the wall, her head bouncing off the flat surface like a rubber ball. He was on her before she was able to stumble away, his fist connecting with her jaw repetitively and the small boy watching from beyond the cracked doors gasped and growled._

_With a battle cry that would've made his father proud on any other day, young Vegeta burst from his hiding space, his arm cocked back and ready to deliver before he was swatted aside like an insect._

_His mother laid on the floor, nearing unconsciousness, and the boy stood, charging again, a small ki ball forming in his hand, but before he was able to release it, his head met with the corner of his father's regal desk, bringing about a wave of dizziness. He lost his balance and fell to the floor, his vision fading in and out, the room dancing in his vision._

_His father stood over him, slapping him on the cheek to rouse him and it took him a moment to realize he was being spoken too._

" _I want you awake, Vegeta. You'll need to learn this to survive when you're aboard with Frieza."_

_Then, with wide eyes, Vegeta watched as his father stalked over to his mother, who, by now, regained consciousness and was kicking and scratching at the Saiya-jin. The king growled when one of her hands made contact with his right eye, slicing through the skin like butter, blood instantly trailing from the wound, and he took the hand that was flailing and snaped the wrist with a twist of his fingers, causing the Queen to scream out. In her distraction, Vegeta watched as his father hiked up her dress and with wide eyes, he realized what he was about to do._

" _N…n…" he attempted, but the overwhelming feeling of nausea prevented any words from forming as he witnessed his father mount his mother, his cock now out on display and ready to conquer at any moment._

_Unable to fight, Vegeta's mother turned her pain-filled onyx eyes to him and she whispered brokenly, "Close your eyes, little one," before she winced as the man above her forcefully pushed his way inside her dry heat and began to pound away ruthlessly. He didn't care that his length was now covered with blood, he didn't care that his son was in the room, nor did he care that it was his mate that lay beneath him whom he treated so roughly. He cared for little._

_Swallowing, Vegeta closed his eyes, a lone tear sliding down his cheek. Though he was able to block out the visual, the screams and whimpers his mother attempted to muffle he could still hear perfectly. The grunts of his father as he roughly slide in and out of the poor woman bounced around the room and it seemed like it went on forever._

_Then, it was over…_

The monitor that stood next to the bed began to blink in and out, before suddenly sparks emitted from the machine and life of the monitor faded. Bulma's heart was hammering as, one by one, the light fixtures grew brighter before sparking out and the hair on her skin stood on end.

His ki was out of control.

"Vegeta, calm down… Your ki…" She yelped when the speakers that stood behind her bed began to spark and she winced as the tiny specks of flames flew just inches from her face.

Vegeta slowly pulled his hand from the wall, blood dripping from the little cuts that he endured from his outburst. The air around him crackled with energy, his body was tense and utterly still. Then, he blinked and shook his head, his gaze finding his injured hand and the hole in the wall with confusion.

Funny, he didn't remember punching the wall.

"Vegeta…" the hesitant voice of his wife made him turn around and the sight that met his eyes shocked him. The light fixtures that hung from the ceiling were smoking and hanging limply, the bright light they once produced no longer radiating from them. Behind the bed, the speakers were still sparking and he could tell from the singed markings that they too no longer worked. The annoying heart monitor that stood next to the bed was also off, and tiny trails of smoke flowed out from the machine.

Then his eyes met the fearful ones of his wife's, his mate who sat on the bed, battered and bruised, completely confused and entirely afraid as to what had just occurred. It had only been a few days since she ended up in the infirmary, because of him, and now that she was finally awake, he nearly hurt her again.

He swallowed heavily and glanced down at his hands, watching as his good one flexed and sparked with energy and he sighed.

She was right. He was out of control.

But was he ready to reveal his true self to the one being he knew he couldn't handle losing? Was he really ready to unload his burden on her shoulders?

Taking one more glance at his wife, who sat on the bed, giving him his space, he decided.

No, he wasn't ready. Not yet and maybe he never would be.

But he knew he didn't have a choice anymore.

_oOo_

… _TBC…_  



	4. Chapter Three

Bulma sighed as she was wheeled out of the infirmary. It had been just over a week since she woke from her drug induced coma, and nearly two weeks since the incident with the simulator and since she awoke, Vegeta only came to see her a few times. The night she awoke, she tried to confront her husband, albeit not the best idea, but she needed to say something. Only to her surprise, he tensed up, snapped, and nearly blew the room to bits. She could tell from the look he had given her that he didn’t remember a thing and for just a second, there was panic in his eyes.

She knew he knew things were worse. She also knew he was going to be even more stubborn about it and avoid her.

And she was right.

Shortly after he snapped out of it, he took one long look at her, shame replacing his panic expression, and he fled the room, only to return twice upon the insistence of their son. Bulma was relieved to see Trunks, was relieved to see not a scratch on him, and the moment he was able to see her sitting up straight in bed, food sitting nearby, and the cuts on her face mostly healed, he was relieved too.

And now, she was able to leave the confining walls of the infirmary. Sitting in one place too long did not bode well with the heiress and just after a day of being awake and aware, she also became antsy, though her antsy tendencies couldn’t entirely be blamed on sitting in one place for too long.

Sleep, an activity she once cherished after a long day, became a thing she dreaded having to do. The terrifying images she would witness after closing her eyes would always stick with her when she awoke. And it seemed like each night, the dreams would get worse. Never before had her mind conjured up such vivid and horrifying images. The brutality she witnessed behind closed eyes always jolted her awake. They always felt so real.

One dream in particular stood out.

It was reoccurring. Almost every other night, she would have it. Just the thought of it made her nauseous. She could remember how the lizard’s slimy hands felt on her skin, how hard his grip was on her hips, the bite marks she endured from his ruthless mouth, and his harsh thrusting. Every morning when she awoke, she expected to feel sore in the areas he grabbed her, in the areas he touched, but she only felt dirty and nauseated.

She never once voiced her dreams. Vegeta was dealing with enough. Why bother him with her own petty worries, she reasoned with herself.

Bulma was quickly snapped out of her thoughts then the elevator _dinged_ in arrival and she frowned. She had been so lost in her thoughts she never once noticed she was sitting in the elevator till the doors opened to reveal her father and Trunks. Even though she smiled brightly at the two, she couldn’t help but feel disappointed that Vegeta was nowhere in sight. Her father smiled and nodded kindly to the nurse before relieving her of her duty and began to wheel Bulma down the hall, Trunks bouncing at her side with overfilled joy that she was home.

“Where’s Vegeta?” she asked as they turned a corner.

Trunks tensed as he walked next to his mother, his hand resting on the arm of the chair and absentmindedly he gripped it tightly. Bulma frowned as she gazed at her son, who remained abnormally quiet, his head tilted away from her somewhat as they continued to walk.

“Sweetie, are you alright?” Bulma rested her hand atop of his, reminding him she was next to him and he immediately loosened his grip, her delicate touch easing the confusion and anger that fueled inside the young child.

Trunks continued to frown at the floor, his thoughts warring in him. He knew something was horribly wrong with his father, though he wasn’t sure why. He knew his father was the cause for his mother’s injuries, but again, he wasn’t sure why. But one thing that bothered him the most was his father’s reaction to the whole ordeal. For a few days, he kept to himself, only visiting Bulma to appease his son.

But then, the tension and guilt began to eat away at the Prince. Each day, each night, he was bombarded with flashbacks, each one worse than before. It became too much. The last time he saw Bulma, he noticed the slight tension she carried while he was present in the room. He knew she was apprehensive of him now, his flashbacks making him more dangerous than ever before. Never had he imagined he’d be a danger to his own family, but then again, never had he thought he’d have the capacity of hurting his own mate.

He needed to get his thoughts under control. So three days ago, Vegeta approached his father-in-law and announced he was leaving, his urgent need to control his flashbacks taking priority over the situation at hand. Although Dr. Briefs didn’t agree with his decision, he understood.

“He left a few days ago, dear. Said he wanted to train in the woods for awhile,” Dr. Briefs explained to his daughter as he wheeled her into the main part of the compound.

Bulma frowned. She knew that wasn’t entirely true, but kept quiet anyways. Trunks ran ahead of her and into the kitchen, disappearing from sight as she was wheeled to the table. The next thing she knew, a glass of ice water was placed in front of her, and she smiled at her son who bounced on his heels nervously.

“Are you hungry, Mom? Grandpa ordered pizza earlier,” he said, his eyes wide as he rambled.

Bulma chuckled and placed a hand on top of his head, her fingers sliding through his hair gently. “Thanks sweetie, but I’m okay…” she cupped his cheek, concern now etching her features. “Are you alright, though?”

Trunks shrugged, his feet shuffling. “Yeah, I guess…” He bit his lip nervously before he glanced up at her, his eyes carrying the innocence of a six year old. “Mom… What’s wrong with Dad?”

Bulma glanced at her father whom took a seat next to her and she sighed, unsure of how to approach such a delicate situation. Though her son was young, dumb he wasn’t. Sensing his daughter’s struggle, Dr. Briefs spoke up.

“Trunks, your father is… dealing with some inner demons, you can say,” he began to explain, his hand patting the chair next to him in invitation for Trunks to sit, to which he did.

Bulma sighed and smiled at her father with gratitude, before carrying on. “Trunks, sweetie,” she started. “How much do you know about your father’s past?” Bulma hoped he didn’t know much, but she couldn’t be certain. There had been many night Vegeta and she would talk, and knowing her son, he had the habit of eavesdropping.

Fortunately, Trunks shook his head. “Not much. Just what you and Dad told me… That he’s a Prince from some distant planet and he was in some guy’s army for a long time.”

The two adults nodded. “Well, love, before your father began living here, he went through some…” Bulma cringed as she tried to word it best. “…he went through some pretty terrible things and now it’s affecting him. He’s trying to deal with it the best he can,” she stated, only to trail off when her father shook his head.

Trunks frowned. “But, I don’t understand… Why did he blow up the simulator?”

“Trunks, m’boy, your father sometimes see’s things that aren’t there,” Dr. Briefs once again interrupted.

“What, like schizophrenia?” he questioned and Bulma inwardly beamed at his vast knowledge for one so young.

“Kind of,” he said. “Except, in your father’s case, he’d fall more under post-traumatic stress disorder.”

Bulma cringed and muttered, “Don’t let him hear you say that, he’ll deny it to his dying breath.”

Trunks nodded. “So, what did Dad see that was so bad? What did he do?”

Bulma shook her head. “I don’t know, baby. Your father is very secretive when it comes to his past. But he’ll be alright, we’re working on it.” Even if she knew more than she did, she wouldn’t burden her son with the horrors his father faced. He was too young, no matter how smart or wise he appeared to be.

They all sat at the table in silence, wondering just how worse things could possibly get.

_oOo_

_…TBC…_


	5. Chapter Four

A terrifying squeal rang through the air, the blood-curdling sound causing a flock of birds to scatter from the tree tops. The sun had long since set, the stars twinkling to life one by one in the night sky, and the false moon rose slowly. All had been quiet, with the exception of a family of wild bores that roamed near the creek, having been frightened as a dark figure launched itself from the shadows of the forest, its eyes narrowed and glowing with hunger.

With a low growl and a quick twist, a squealing pig’s neck snapped, its body becoming limp in a matter of seconds.

Satisfied, Vegeta reached down to grasp the carcasses legs before dragging it away towards the small base he had built for himself. He dropped his prize near a pile of wood and quickly went to work on gutting the animal.

His bare hands dug into the flesh with little care and he twisted one of the legs several times, the ripping sounds of flesh and crunching of bones would’ve made a normal human retch, but the sounds only made him hungry as he continued to rip apart his meal.

He had barely ate, barely slept, the majority of his time spent meditating as he attempted to control his flashbacks. It had been nearly three weeks since he left Capsule Corp for refuge in the forest and each night away left him relieved knowing that at least his son and mate were safe from him. The sight of his mate bed-ridden, bruised and broken because of his actions hit him harder than he imagined it would. The guilt was more than he could take and the constant bombarding of his sons demands that they visit the woman nearly drove him to insanity.

He wanted nothing more than to run, the sight of her broken body twisting his stomach unpleasantly.

And run he did.

While his son slept, he sought out his father-in-law, demanding the old man look after his heir while he was away. He could sense the disapproval coming off in waves from the man that had stood before him, but he didn’t care. And without waiting for a reply, Vegeta had turned and left with only the clothing on his back.

He needed to detach himself from the life he had built in order to focus.

The first night he was away, Vegeta flew to the furthest part of the planet and in the midst of flying, a flashback took hold of the prince and in a burst of chaos, he destroyed a large mountain, the explosion leaving a barren land in its wake. When Vegeta came to, he was hovering in midair over a smoking crater and he blinked in shock. However, instead of accepting the need of help, Vegeta flew even further until he decided the distance was enough between him and his family.

He took refugee deep within a rain forest, the hot, muggy climate almost reminding him of Vegeta-sei. It was the closest to comfort he would experience.

By day, he meditated and by night he hunted.

With each passing day the prince grew more unattached as he fought against his flashbacks, only to sometimes awaken and realize that days had passed since his last moment of awareness. There was even a moment he surrounded himself in water, his body submerged deep under a large pond in an attempt to block out all noise as he concentrated on his own mind, his own inner demons.

And then, there were times when he would blink just once and Frieza would be standing inches away from him, a disgusting smirk playing on his lips. It was during those moments Vegeta lost control.

He attempted to evade sleep as much as possible, the thought of the nightmares that would surely torture him in his most vulnerable state was sickening to him. But after going without sleep for days on end, the flashbacks only became worse. Vegeta began to hallucinate, the images much more vivid than a normal flashback, until finally, he collapsed from sheer exhaustion.

And as he slept, he dreamt.

_The planet was small in size and large in population. It was known for its rebellious tendencies against the Empire and that was why he was sent. Very few planets chose to rebel against the tyrant whom called himself Ruler of the Universe, and each one found themselves meeting the face of death whose appearance resembled that of the long forgotten Saiya-jin no Ouji._

_It was the same result with each one. They rebelled, secretly building weapons with the intent to destroy the Empire, only to be ambushed by Frieza’s famously known pet, Vegeta. The purge was never hard, but this one was different._

_Vegeta had just emerged from the pit, his wounds were still fresh from the punishment that was inflicted on him, and he was angry._

_He had been detained for days, retaliation against his tormentors was strong, but the collar he had worn prevented such urges from becoming actual actions. That was what he got for spitting in the face of the man whom referred to himself as ‘Master.’ Vegeta knew it was a play on his pride, especially when in the presence of the bastard’s family, but when he was told to get on his knees and kiss the feet of those he saw as lesser beings, how could he control his reaction?_

_He knew Frieza would never kill him; he was his favorite pet after all. He did all the dirty work while Frieza sat on his lazy ass and watched. So, instead of death, he was sent to a place much worse._

_And now, the young Saiya-jin emerged from his pod, a deep scowl on his face, scouter firmly placed over his left ear, and he took in the sight of the planet that would soon be no more. Without saying a word to either of his comrades, Vegeta lifted into the air, his sights set on the city in the distance. He didn’t need to look behind him to know Nappa and Raditz were following, but instead of turning to them to give the order, Vegeta stuck out his hand and began to fire, screams instantly filling the air at the attack._

_Satisfaction at hearing the screams filled his being. He turned his head to the side to see a group escape inside a small building and Vegeta shook his head before landing in front of the door. He casually walked in, the crowd cowering as he waltzed inside and he eyed them with a bored expression._

_Until one man stepped forward._

_He was taller than the prince, but heavier in weight. His bald coned head shone with sweat and his hands trembled as he held the foreign weapon, pointed at Vegeta._

_“J-just l-leave! W-we won’t h-hurt yo-you if you… you just go!” The man shouted in his tongue. He quivered when Vegeta just cocked a brow, the gun in his hands unsteady and within a second, the barrel of the gun was bent downwards before the weapon itself was tossed from his hands. He yelped, causing the crowd behind him to scream in fright and he backed up several paces when he noticed Vegeta was now only standing a foot in front of him._

_Before he knew it, his neck was ceased, his feet were dangling inches above the floor, and the sweet air he breathed was cut off._

_Vegeta’s lip curled in disgust when he noticed the wet stain in the man’s trousers and he slowly returned his deadly gaze to the struggling creature in his grasp. “Pathetic. A rebel planet and you think you can fight me off with a gun?” He lowered the man, but didn’t loosen his grip. “You’ve no idea who you are dealing with,” he murmured into the man’s face. “You’re a blind race if you think you can defeat Frieza with petty guns and weak men such as yourself.”_

_And with that said, Vegeta lifted his free hand, now fisted with his thumb sticking out, before he dug it into the man’s right eye. He could feel the fluid seep out as he put pressure on the ball and he watched as it dripped down his thumb to the floor. He made sure to dig his thumb in deep, twisting it clockwise and counterclockwise as he dislodged the eye from its socket. He smirked in approval at the blood-curdling screams, the howling of pain, and when the prince withdrew his thumb, the man’s eye was stuck on the end of it. He shook his hand to free it of the oozing ball and went to work on the other eye, only this time, he dug his thumb into the socket twice._

_If they were a blind race, they were going to actually be a blind race._

_It wasn’t long until he was finished and he dropped the dead-weight that was the man to the floor. Already, he was feeling better and once he was through with this planet, he was sure his time in the pit would be but a dull aching memory. His eyes lifted to the crowd that was gathered in the back and advanced, the screams of pain echoing like music to his ears._

Now, Vegeta sat at the edge of his camp, his belly full, but his mind still tormented with the constant memories of his past. He could still hear the screams and pleas of mercy if he closed his eyes. He could easily remember each face of the men, women, and children to which he tortured just for the hell of it. Back then, he took pleasure in their pain. It overrode his own if only for a short time.

Dreaming of the children were the worst. Once upon a time, Vegeta could’ve cared less whether they were grown, little, or newly born, as long as they felt the pain he dealt with every day. But now, when he awoke from his nightmares, he couldn’t help but want to vomit at his actions. And it didn’t help when he would dream of Trunks face as the one he tortured.

These dreams, these flashbacks, these nightmares made him feel less like a man and more like a devil, a monster born to cause pain, to bathe in blood, and rule a world where he got satisfaction off another’s own misery. He wouldn’t admit it… not yet… but he didn’t want to be that man. And as time drew on, the more Vegeta felt he was losing himself to that devil.

He didn’t allow himself to think of his mate often, but in this instance, he couldn’t help but picture her. What would she think if he came clean? How would she react? Would she pity him, be disgusted by him? Would she not see the prince he wanted her to see, but the monster he saw himself as? He never thought it would matter to him how she thought of him, but surprisingly, her opinion of him mattered the most. He couldn’t bring himself to disappoint her. He knew she knew she was sharing a bed with a mass murderer, but the little she knew about him, about his past was astonishing and he kept it that way on purpose.

He was a rapist, a torturer, a murderer, and he liked doing it… once.

Vegeta sighed and shoved the bone he was holding away. Even though he spent time away from the compound and the comforts of his mate’s flesh, his flashbacks were just as harsh as before. Whatever he was doing, it wasn’t working and even though it was a blow to his pride, he knew help was what he needed.

He just wasn’t sure if he could bring himself to ask for it.

_oOo_

_…TBC…_

_[DISCONTINUED]_


End file.
